The immaculate conception of Allison Pearson

It’s not for Rats in a Sack to say Telegraph columnist Allison Pearson has finally lost it, but she was triggered enough by a throwaway line in a newspaper column to go on a lengthy social media tirade which finally culminated in a claim to have been born by immaculate conception.

Pearson is still engaged in her “free speech” fight with Essex Police, a long and tedious saga sparked by her X post incorrectly describing supporters of Pakistani political party Tehreek-e-Insaf as “Jew haters”, and the Manchester police officers standing beside them as being from the Met.

In a column for the Times earlier this month, Hugo Rifkind wrote how Americans “will tell me the UK has become an oppressive dystopia that now routinely arrests people for merely opposing immigration. ‘No,’ I will say. ‘Tommy Robinson?’ they’ll say. ‘That was contempt of court,’ I’ll say. ‘Allison Pearson?’ they’ll try. ‘Not arrested,’ I’ll say, adding that nobody really knows why the police rang her bell, but it certainly wasn’t for that.”

And that was the extent of her mention. Innocuous? Not for Allison, who first reacted that it was “disgraceful” and that “any decent person can see that was Stasi-like. For a JOURNALIST not to object is beyond the pale”.

She didn’t stop there though. She then claimed that “Hugo isn’t a real journalist… He lacks courage. He did nothing to stand up against Covid lockdown tyranny, nothing to protect innocent children from trans ideology. Nothing to defend freedom against Kafkaesque NCHIs. I’m proud of the work I do and, unlike Hugo, am loved by my readers.” (It is unclear how Rifkind, whose primary role is to write a parody diary column on Saturdays, was supposed to do any of those things.)

She told journalist Tanya Gold, defending Rifkind: “Has he stood up for Jews as I have stood up for them, Tanya? Not judging by the reception his name got at a recent event I did at JW3. And I see no brilliant journalism. No beautiful words, no bravery, just hereditary privilege.” (Rifkind is Jewish. Pearson is not.)

Finally, she concluded, in a dig at Rifkind, the son of former foreign secretary Malcolm: “At least I’m not someone’s child!”.

It’s a Christmas miracle!